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The hardest thing about writing your own vows for your wedding day is knowing where to start. (You are not alone!) You love you partner, and can not wait to spend forever together. . . but how do you put that all into writing? 

Below I share some tried and true ways to get started one writing your own vows. If you have questions or are still struggling, please reach out to me, I am here to help!

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Start by jotting down notes about your relationship. I often suggest using a notebook, or even a "notes" app on your phone, because if you're like me things will pop into your head when you are driving or at work!


Set aside some time to reflect on your fiancé. Think about how you felt when you first met, what made you fall in love, and when you knew you wanted to spend the rest of your lives together. Write it all out to get your creative gears turning.


Come up with one or two, or many, promises. They're called vows for a reason, so the promises are the most important part. One tip: "Include promises that are broad in scope, such as 'I promise to always support you,' as well as very specific to the two of you, like 'I promise to say "I love you" every night before bed,'"


  • What hard times have you gone through together, or how do you support each other?

  • What do you want to accomplish together, and what are you looking forward to in the life you are building?

  • What makes your relationship tick, and why are you great for each other?

  • What did you think when you first saw your fiancé?

  • When did you realize you were in love?

  • What do you most respect about your partner, or what qualities do you admire?

  • How has your life gotten better since meeting?

  • What about your partner inspires you?

  • What do you miss most about them when you're apart?


ANOTHER SUGGESTION FOR YOUR VOWS - 5 Steps to writing your vows - from


Step One: Be Timeless With A Twist

When it comes to this wedding vows template, we recommend starting out by talking about what marriage means to you. Consider including one of your favorite lines from a book, poem, or song as part of your wedding vow structure. Keep this part short, but allow it to introduce the fact that you’re here to marry your beloved.

Example: I, Brian, take you, Caitlin, to be my wife. “You and you alone make me feel that I am alive. Other men it is said have seen angels, but I have seen thee and thou art enough.” - George Moore


Step Two: Reference Some Relationship Highlights

Now it’s time to take a look back at your relationship. How long have you been together? Three years, six years, maybe even more? Try to recall all of those relationship “firsts” you experienced together as a team: the first time you got the courage to call, the first time you went on a dinner date, the first time you held hands, the first time you brought your better half home to meet your folks, the first time you actually argued (and apologized), and the first time you talked about forever. A wedding vows template is not complete without sharing some memorable moments from throughout your relationship.


Example: I know this is true because the moment you walked up to me on the beach during Memorial Day, you brought butterflies to my stomach that never left—literally!

Step Three: Share Sentimental Qualities

If you're writing your wedding vows, talk about how your partner brings out the best in you, and vice versa (you can brag a bit here if you desire!). For example, one person might possess a quiet, shy demeanor, while the other might possess a louder, outgoing demeanor. Compliment your beloved on all the ways they have made you who you are in this world.


Example: There are too many qualities that come to my mind. One, you are extremely thoughtful. You treat every day like it is a special occasion to celebrate with cake and cupcakes. Two, you are extremely faithful. You would not hurt a fly. And three, you are extremely adventurous. You keep me on my toes with your happy-go-lucky attitude.

Step Four: Include "I Love You Because..."

You could shout these three words from the rooftop a lot: “I LOVE YOU!”—so it’s a must in this wedding vows template. If you are searching for a little inspiration, we recommend picking up a copy of What I Love About You By Me by Knock Knock. It contains fun fill-in-the-blank lines to help you describe your affection at the altar.


Example: I love you because you make me laugh when you clean. Despite my messiness, I am thankful that you keep our home lemon-breeze scented. You are always prepared to whip out a Lysol wipe in times of need.

Step Five: Make Your Promises

Before you seal the deal will a smooch, make a few promises for the future. You might be (barely) holding back tears by the end of your exchange, so feel free to add a bit of humor to your wedding vow structure if you'd like!


Example: I promise to give you the remote on the days you want to watch The Real Housewives of New York, I promise to let you sneak a box of Cheez-Its as a late-night snack, and I promise to let you go to bed early like a grandma, even on the weekends.

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